July already

I cannot believe it is July already, I feel bad that I have not blogged since June. So much has happened. We have lost a cousin who was 39 and passed away in her sleep. I told "I" how much I liked her, and he said that she really liked me. I felt sad that I did not get to know her well enough, but I had only seen her a few times in Anguilla, and at brother in laws wedding in Trinidad. Mother in law described how her best friend was standing over her, shaking her saying "wake up T"because she looked like she was peacefully sleeping. Death is so hard for all concerned. I worry for "I" as he takes each death in the family so badly. Life is so precious.
When MJ died I felt sad and watching his memorial 12 days on showed how much he was loved. How do we cope when they are gone, their memory lingers on and you can feel their presence around you. I often feel my maternal grandmother near me. I have felt and smelt her presence when driving once, I felt loved and reassured she was near me. I strongly believe in the afterlife, my faith competes sometimes with the psychic forces I feel inside me. A medium once told me that I had healing hands (and that gift had been passed on from my mothers side going back to GGrandma), but I have chosen not to follow this road.

The road I am on is sometimes a rocky one, but held firmly in my grasp is the Lord. I don't say it much, and don't often make it to Church but he is always there for me.

V's hole in her head has closed some more since the neurosurgeon said it was closing. If that is not a miracle then I don't know what is! We have been told she has GDD (Global Development Delay) and Disordered Language Development. It has come as a shock for us, as things seemed to be going so well, but I guess these things are on paper only. In reality V is V and not what her diagnosis is, sure the diagnosis can go some way to explaining her "differences" but it is an opinion only based on medical examinations, once a year or twice yearly are not nearly enough to understand the truth about her and how she operates. We are also having a referral to clinical psychologist, occupational therapy, autism assessment unit, and social services. I have received no respite for her, and feel it is time that some was given. I hope I am not opening up a can of worms with all this. Getting everyone involved can only help her in the long term. I still have hope for the future for her.